If I Could Change One Thing in My Past...

Have you ever come across that question?

I gave it a good thought tonight, as I am not able to sleep and the time is 3am. Quiet nights give me a clear head, sometimes.

Is there anything to change? Let's examine my past first.

One of the most significant events in the past happened in Form 4 and 5. The things that happened in that 2 years have really altered a lot of things today.

I was going through a weird time, stuck between being a teenager and wanting to have freedom like an adult would have. Having to face up with the SPM exams while teachers are working very hard to prepare the students, I appeared to be least interested in a class filled with elite students. Always failing my papers and getting myself into a lot of trouble with my parents.

The kind of trouble I was in doesn't just involve my studies. I was at a all-time-low spiritually with God. Got into situations that compromised moral standards and Godly values, I was in the gutter, quite literally.

But God was faithful. He still is. It was that time I cried out to Him. Like, literally CRIED. And He was faithful and gracious. I know He was the only who can save me.

The things that I've gone through that time shaped me to be who I am today, positively. I used to think and say that I stopped "growing up" since 16. Now looking back as a 22-year-old, I was wrong. He made me go through it for a reason, and coming out of it victorious sure marks a milestone and a story to tell of His goodness and faithfulness.

If He hadn't allow all that, I will have NOTHING to glorify God with.

Back to that question- "If you could change one thing in your past, what would it be?"

I'd say confidently,full of conviction. "Nothing."